the year of you, day 47

Tuesday, February 16, 2021

Meditation Music: Balance: Liquid Mind –

Question: What is a rule or principle you disagreed with or rebelled against growing up you now agree with or know to be true?

Answer: To be honest, there wasn’t a rule that I disagreed with or rebelled against growing up because if I did such a thing, I would get punished – and typically it was severe. The two times I remember that I “stole” something – at least in my father’s eyes, I was punished so bad that I couldn’t sit down in a chair. I grew up in a household where my father ruled with an iron fist (or a leather belt), so being punished for stuff seemed to be the norm. For me, if the question was, “what is a rule or principle your agreed with or didn’t rebel against growing up that you now disagree with or know to be false, that would be much easier. Here are a few for example:

  • Children should be seen, not heard.
  • Do as I say, not as I do.
  • The only way you’ll learn you lesson is by being severely punished.
  • Don’t trust white people.

You have to remember that I was born in 1963 and spent my childhood in north New Jersey. My father had to deal with the severe racism and riots, so I’m sure he had a lot of anger back then. I think to the things I’ve gone through in my journey (such as being told that I got my job because of my color, not because of my knowledge, skills, and abilities) – and can only imagine that it was much, much worse for my parents. And they somehow found a way to make it. So, as I write this, one of the things I never believed is that a black male has to do twice as much just to be considered at the same level as an average white male. And although I never would say that it was definitely true, I do know instances in my life, as well as many of my black friends, where this was true, such as being passed by on job promotions or awards. I do remember an instance where I was up for an award in one of my previous positions; and because of a few jealous faculty members, they decided to concoct a plan to keep me from getting the award – and threatened to derail my career. I always believed in the good in people, but as we all know, the more successful you become, the more you open yourself up for bad things to happen. And this was one of those instances. Despite all that, I still believe that there’s goodness in most people’s heart – and I surround myself with like-minded souls to make sure that happens!

Other Stuff

Today will be short. As you may notice, personal development and growth is important to me and the work that I do. Here’s another article on personal development that you might find useful:

My belief is that you read stuff that’s useful, throw away all the rest. I try to find ONE nugget in everything I read, watch, and attend. Even if it’s the MOST BORING meeting in the world, find one thing that you can take away that could be useful. With everything that I’m sharing, find at least one useful thing and add that to your toolbox.


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