Today’s post contains a process to be your own coach, also known as “self-coaching.” I attended “The Future of Coaching in Higher Education” Summit at the University of Colorado last week – interesting event. As I was listening to the conversations around me for the two-plus days around academic/success coaching, I kept asking myself, “Is it possible for students to coach themselves?”
On average, 60% of students graduate from 4-year college and about 30% graduate from a 2-year college. However, that means that 40% DO NOT graduate from a 4-year school and 70% DO NOT graduate from a 2-year school – which is alarming to me. Would it be possible to teach ALL STUDENTS the skills to self-coach, to challenge themselves to optimize their lives to become better people and profoundly serve others?
Well, here’s the process I’ve put together; please share your comments and thoughts with me and with others.
You Can Do It: Self-Coaching Your Way to Success!
What is self-coaching?
- A desire to make a change in your life.
- Knowledge of where you are at the present moment.
- Identification of a specific goal to change and a timeline to complete this goal.
- Define what might hold you back from completing the goal and a process to minimize its effect.
- A process to track your progress on this goal.
- Once completed, summarize your results – what worked, what didn’t work.
- Give yourself a REWARD for a job WELL DONE!
- Don’t wait…start om your next goal immediately!
Use these self-assessment tools to determine the state of your life right now. You can self-asses using simple reflective questions or more extensive self evaluations. Bottom line: You have to know where you are before you can determine where you want to go.
- Quick Reflection: Where (or How) do you really see yourself right now? What’s working? What’s not working?
- Self-Rating: How do you rate your life on a scale from 1 to 10? Why did you give yourself this number?
- Tools: My Life Self Assessment. (You can download this self-assessment here: my life self assessment, 8-1-19
What contributes to the need for change?
- Reflection: Why do you feel the need to make a change in your life?
Setting Self-Coaching Goals
- Goal Setting Questions: “What’s ONE change for the better do I want to see in myself?” and “What’s ONE THING I need to do that’s really important in my life and and will move me towards the person I want to become?”
- It may be helpful to start off your goal sentence by completing the following sentence: I will…
Keep your statement in a place where you’ll be able to see it often and track it on a daily basis.
Obstacles: What Get’s in the Way
What typically stops you from achieving your goals and making positive changes in your life? See if any of these obstacles keep you from achieving your goals:
- Undesirable Habits: procrastinating; disorganization; indecisive; lazy/unmotivated; irresponsible.
- Limiting Beliefs: I’m too…; I can’t afford that; I’ve always been this way; He or she won’t let me; I don’t deserve…
- Unhealthy Relationships: mother/father; life partner/spouse; children; friends; boss; brothers/sisters.
- Distractions: economy; housework; your past; your physical appearance; your health; the weather.
- Fears: failure, rejection; success; disappointment; recognition; change; looking stupid; increase expectations.
- Lack of: money; resources; knowledge; support; time; confidence; imagination; alternatives; help.
- “If this happens: ________ (something that will keep you from achieving your goal), then I will do this: _______ (something that will move you forward towards completing the goal).
- 7-Day Life Design Challenge (one week)
- 28-Day Life Design Challenge (one month)
- 63-Day Life Design Challenge (based on the average time it takes to change a habit)
- Once you complete your goal, give yourself a meaningful reward.
- If you don’t complete the goal, either try the same goal again or pick a different goal. Sometimes, the goal we pick isn’t really something we want.
- Get started on your next goal right away; momentum is the best way to keep moving forward.
Things to Think About
- If you’re new at this, choose a goal that easy to complete.
- If discipline is a problem, set yourself a one-week timeline. You can try ANYTHING for a week!
- Accept that it might take some time to achieve results. Patience and deliberate practice is key.
- Use a journal to document your self-coaching experiences; it’s a great way to remember what works and what doesn’t work.
- Understand that you will hit obstacles – and setbacks are inevitable. It’s constant learning about YOU!
- Don’t be surprised if you fail, because all people fail at something. Forgive yourself and start again tomorrow.
- Find ways to integrate the self-coaching process into your life on a daily basis.
- Just Start – Action speaks louder than words!